{"id":2,"date":"2012-03-20T18:48:13","date_gmt":"2012-03-20T18:48:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/?page_id=2"},"modified":"2012-08-09T09:25:12","modified_gmt":"2012-08-09T14:25:12","slug":"welcome-kreme-keeper","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/welcome-kreme-keeper\/","title":{"rendered":"A Welcome From The Kreme Keeper"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Kreme<\/a>Welcome my deliciously deviant dedicated disciples of debauchery to the Kreme Vault, a lavishly lascivious literary library of twisted tales. I am your host, the Kreme Keeper, and if you’ve found your way this far, kiddies, you might as well spiral helplessly out of control as your mind is melted, your body blown, and your intelligence incinerated.<\/p>\n

The tales from this special blend of Kreme will not take you into the expected erotica encountered everyday, but rather into the twisted turns of torrid tremblings, where the everyday becomes explosively orgasmic, short-circuiting all aspects of mental management into a scintillating climax of carnal cravings.<\/p>\n

The stories are sexual in nature, as are all things Kreme, so prepare the perverse portion of propensities propagating your every thought for tales that aren’t mere words strung together but are in fact roller coasters of ripe romps where anything can happen and anyone can end up simmering in the newest kauldron of kreme.<\/p>\n

Dare you taste of a mere drop of kreme, or should you leap lecherously long into lengthy tales, guaranteed to leave you mindlessly moaning for more? The taste is free, however as the keeper of the Kreme, it is my regretful responsibility to warn you that a taste is not enough and as the author once said, “feed your mind the kreme, and your thoughts will be glazed forever”.<\/p>\n

~ the Kreme Keeper<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Welcome my deliciously deviant dedicated disciples of debauchery to the Kreme Vault, a lavishly lascivious literary library of twisted tales. I am your host, the Kreme Keeper, and if you’ve found your way this far, kiddies, you might as well spiral helplessly out of control as your mind is melted, your body blown, and your … <\/p>\n

Continue reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":253,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-2","page","type-page","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","nodate","item-wrap"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/P2iXk7-2","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":89,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kreme-komics\/","url_meta":{"origin":2,"position":0},"title":"Kreme Komics","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"April 29, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"The Kreme Keeper has branched out into the world of comic books and here are some samples of his wares! Just click on any of the pages below to purchase them from the Breast Expansion Story Club!","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"Tales From The Kreme Komic","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/KremeKomic-sampler1.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/KremeKomic-sampler1.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/KremeKomic-sampler1.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":37777,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kreme-kontact\/kreme-news\/","url_meta":{"origin":2,"position":1},"title":"Kreme News","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"March 25, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Join the Kreme's Mailing List! Find out about new Kreme releases before they appear! Receive excerpts from some of the best Kreme stories! This mailing list is infrequent, generally one email per month. The Kreme does not intend to spam your email at any time. As a bonus for subscribing,\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"With 2 comments","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kreme-kontact\/kreme-news\/#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"Kreme Koat of Arms","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms1.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms1.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms1.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms1.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":297,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kreme-books\/","url_meta":{"origin":2,"position":2},"title":"Kreme Books","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"August 1, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Needing another heaping helping of Kremey goodness? Here you will find the pages on the site where you can see all of the books that the Kreme has published! Books are grouped by year of release, so just click on the years below!","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":207,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kreme-kontact\/","url_meta":{"origin":2,"position":3},"title":"Kreme Kontact","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"June 23, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Would you like to kontact Kris P. Kreme? Just use this form and your thoughts will be sent to him immediately! Please Note: Not all requests can be filled. Also, please be aware that all characters must be over eighteen years of age. Other specific requests may have to be\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":221,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kustom-kreme\/","url_meta":{"origin":2,"position":4},"title":"Kustom Kreme","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"July 2, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Would you like to have a story kustom written by the Kreme? I offer a kustom story service for my fans! I have certain rules which are that whatever the story is about, there cannot be any themes involving murder or death, nor should any of the characters in the\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"With 2 comments","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kustom-kreme\/#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"Kreme Kustom Tale pic","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/07\/KremeKustomTale-pic.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/07\/KremeKustomTale-pic.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/07\/KremeKustomTale-pic.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1947,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/kreme-books\/2013-kreme-releases\/","url_meta":{"origin":2,"position":5},"title":"2013 Kreme Releases","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"January 15, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Wondering what books the Kreme has published in 2013? Needing another heaping helping of Kremey goodness? Here's a list of the books, short summaries of each, and links where you can find them! Books are listed from last published in 2013 to first published. \u00a0 \u00a0 The Kuickies #5 -\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Similar post","link":""},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/KremeKoatofArms.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/2","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/2\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":255,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/2\/revisions\/255"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/253"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}