{"id":19180,"date":"2013-12-27T20:32:33","date_gmt":"2013-12-28T02:32:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/?p=19180"},"modified":"2013-12-28T14:25:22","modified_gmt":"2013-12-28T20:25:22","slug":"peteys-kind-of-pervy-for-an-elf","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2013\/12\/27\/peteys-kind-of-pervy-for-an-elf\/","title":{"rendered":"Petey’s kind of Pervy for an Elf"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Petey<\/a>

Petey the Pervy Elf by Kris P. Kreme<\/p><\/div>\n

When Santa decides to punish Petey for being a truly naughty elf, the tables soon become turned as Petey gets a hold of some of Santa’s magic wishing dust and discovers that not all letters to Santa are from children or asking for merely toys.<\/p>\n

Using the wishing dust and his own perverse mind, Petey begins granting wishes, corrupting unsuspecting individuals all over with the post-Christmas chaos which follows.<\/p>\n

A brand new Tale destined to result in pleas for yearly visits to an all new korner of the Kreme universe; Adventures in Santa-Land.<\/p>\n

Find it on Smashwords now!<\/a><\/p>\n

Now On Amazon!<\/a><\/p>\n

Everyone knows that Santa has a lot on his plate around this time of year. He has so much work to do that doing it alone would never work and so that’s where the legendary helpers he calls elves enter the picture.<\/p>\n

However, not all elves are as jolly and kind as old Saint Nick. Occasionally there are elves with attitude, elves who find a few better things to focus on that harmony and world peace at this time of year, and most disappointingly, elves that choose not to focus on their jobs and helping out their fellow elves.<\/p>\n

Petey is just such an elf, having been a nuisance as long as Santa can remember. Petey rarely has any interest in his fellow elves unless it’s a perverse interest in watching the cuter ones get undressed. The time has come for Santa to punish Petey, to set Petey’s mind back on track by using the mind scrambler, a magical machine that only works to wipe an elf’s mind clean and begin with a blank slate of cheery conformity.<\/p>\n

Petey has to avoid this punishment, and the way becomes clear when Santa locks him in a room to await his mind scrambling. Petey the Pervy Elf discovers that this is the very room where all the rejected letters to Santa end up. Many who write to Santa as a joke or just out of corrupt intentions or desires have their names permanently on the naughty list. This year Petey has just the thing to make those naughty desires in the rejected letters come true.<\/p>\n

Using some sneakily stolen wishing dust, Petey sets out to read the various letters, choosing particularly perverse ones to grant their every desire, even if the desires are depraved and dirty.<\/p>\n

Thanks to Petey this year, a senior in high school will have his wishes for a truly aphrodisiac body spray come true, every female in range instantly in heat for him. Devon, a married man with a cold wife who constantly insults his manhood will have endless stamina and the ability to quite literally cum a firehose worth, thawing out his wife in no time. And finally Beth, an entitled girl who loves sex and doesn’t wanna have to work for her money will find the world accepting her as nothing more than a fuck toy to toss money at with less discretion than a vending machine.<\/p>\n

Petey the Pervy Elf is creating post-Christmas chaos and proudly perverting the planet, one naughty wish at a time.<\/p>\n

Find it on Smashwords now!<\/a><\/p>\n

Now On Amazon!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When Santa decides to punish Petey for being a truly naughty elf, the tables soon become turned as Petey gets a hold of some of Santa’s magic wishing dust and discovers that not all letters to Santa are from children or asking for merely toys. Using the wishing dust and his own perverse mind, Petey … <\/p>\n

Continue reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":19181,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[44,4],"tags":[74,63],"class_list":["post-19180","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-khristmas-with-the-kreme","category-tales-from-the-kreme","tag-khristmas-with-the-kreme","tag-tales-from-the-kreme","item-wrap"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/12\/PeteythePervyElf-cover.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2iXk7-4Zm","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":45913,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2023\/12\/30\/its-been-10-years-of-krismas\/","url_meta":{"origin":19180,"position":0},"title":"It’s been 10 years of Krismas","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"December 30, 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Ten years ago, the holiday tradition of the Kreme celebrating Krismas began. On this milestone, a collection of those first three works bundled together for the first time! Until January 10, 2024 - 50% off at Smashwords with code CU24B Over 27,000 Words of Krismas Kreme! Holiday Handling: Independent trucker\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Khristmas with the Kreme","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/khristmas-with-the-kreme\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Krismas with the Kreme: A Collection of the Very First Krismas Tales by Kris P. 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Kreme","date":"December 3, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Tis the season for a return to Kris-mas Past with these two Klassic Kreme stories of the season! Straight from Santa\u2019s Grab Bag, two twisted tales of Christmas Chaos! Find out what happens when the time of the season gets naughty in Cum all ye Faithful and Petey the Pervy\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Grab Bag","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/grab-bag\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The GrabBag #4 by Kris P. Kreme","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/TheGrabBag4-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/TheGrabBag4-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/TheGrabBag4-cover.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/TheGrabBag4-cover.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/TheGrabBag4-cover.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/TheGrabBag4-cover.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":21588,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/01\/10\/peteys-uncensored-cover-is-a-little-bit-pervy\/","url_meta":{"origin":19180,"position":2},"title":"Petey’s uncensored cover is a little bit pervy","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"January 10, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"One more slightly late Christmas present, the Kreme shares with his readers the uncensored cover of Petey the Pervy Elf! And in the next few days watch out for the newest of the Kreme's bimbos! Planning to arrive this weekend at Smashwords and Amazon!","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Kremey Picture Goodness","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/kremey-picture-goodness\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Petey the Pervy Elf Uncensored Cover","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/PeteythePervyElf-uncensoredcover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/PeteythePervyElf-uncensoredcover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/PeteythePervyElf-uncensoredcover.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/PeteythePervyElf-uncensoredcover.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/PeteythePervyElf-uncensoredcover.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/PeteythePervyElf-uncensoredcover.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":37322,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/12\/14\/the-teddy-bare\/","url_meta":{"origin":19180,"position":3},"title":"The Teddy Bare","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"December 14, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Another of the covers that was a bit too much for Amazon and Smashwords was the original idea for Talking Teddy. It was a bit too bear... bare. But that's not true here on the Kreme's Blog, so as a treat for the Kreme's fans, here's the cover!","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Khristmas with the Kreme","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/khristmas-with-the-kreme\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Talking Teddy Uncensored Cover by Kris P. 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Kringle is bringing Krismas!","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"December 4, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"It's beginning to look a lot like Krismas and Kris P. Kingle is on his way with gifts of bimbos for all of the Kreme's readers! Keep watching for the many new Christmas themed stories koming very shortly!","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Khristmas with the Kreme","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/khristmas-with-the-kreme\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Krismas-promotion.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Krismas-promotion.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Krismas-promotion.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/Krismas-promotion.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":42878,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2019\/12\/01\/krismas-is-almost-here\/","url_meta":{"origin":19180,"position":5},"title":"Krismas is almost here","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"December 1, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"Have you been bad or good this year Readers? Either way it's almost time for Krismas 2019! Starting Soon...","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"12 Days of Krismas 2019","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/12-days-of-krismas-2019\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"12 Days of Krismas 2019 Ad","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/12DaysofKrismas-2019Ad.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/12DaysofKrismas-2019Ad.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/12DaysofKrismas-2019Ad.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/12DaysofKrismas-2019Ad.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19180","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19180"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19180\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19357,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19180\/revisions\/19357"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/19181"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19180"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19180"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19180"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}