{"id":36836,"date":"2014-09-25T13:08:00","date_gmt":"2014-09-25T18:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/?p=36836"},"modified":"2014-09-26T08:21:06","modified_gmt":"2014-09-26T13:21:06","slug":"get-a-klassic-game","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/09\/25\/get-a-klassic-game\/","title":{"rendered":"Get a Klassic Game"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_36837\" style=\"width: 209px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/AheadoftheGame-cover.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-36837\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-36837\" src=\"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/AheadoftheGame-cover-209x300.jpg\" alt=\"Ahead of the Game by Kris P. Kreme\" width=\"209\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/AheadoftheGame-cover-209x300.jpg 209w, https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/AheadoftheGame-cover-715x1024.jpg 715w, https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/AheadoftheGame-cover.jpg 1400w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 209px) 100vw, 209px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-36837\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Ahead of the Game by Kris P. Kreme<\/p><\/div>\n<p>Jeff is enduring a humiliating performance on television by his favorite college football team. Worse, he&#8217;s just finished his beer and really needs another.<\/p>\n<p>Not wanting to leave his chair, to miss a second of the sucky game, Jeff begins trying to use the Womote 3000 from Trance-tory to make his stubborn wife Gina bring him a beer.<\/p>\n<p>He&#8217;s about to discover just how sucky this day can truly get.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.smashwords.com\/books\/view\/479704\" target=\"_blank\">Find it on Smashwords now!<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/dp\/B00NXBIJC4\" target=\"_blank\"><br \/>\nNow On Amazon!<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Fall has returned and with it Jeff&#8217;s favorite season, college football season. Unfortunately this year his favorite team seems destined to totally suck. As he settles in his favorite chair to watch the game, Jeff is about to unknowingly create one of the most sucky days ever.<\/p>\n<p>Dealing with the game is bad enough but Gina, his incredibly sexy wife, is certainly not cheering him on or cheering him up. She won&#8217;t even bring him a beer when he asks, continually telling him to get it himself, that she has cleaning to do.<\/p>\n<p>Thankfully he thinks, this is the perfect opportunity to try that new Womote 3000 from Trance-tory Technologies. He was half drunk the night he ordered it but as he recalled the big tagline was that it allows a man to &#8220;Always get Ahead&#8221; at least where women were concerned. There was some science junk about it being tuned to the female mind and her bio-rhythms or something, but all he cares about is that like a fancy sonic pet remote, it reportedly will have a woman behaving and following his requests.<\/p>\n<p>All Jeff wants at the moment is a beer to help take the sting off this sucky performance on screen.<\/p>\n<p>Jeff&#8217;s about to discover that more than the aim of his favorite team&#8217;s quarterback is off today as he just keeps missing Gina when pointing the remote and firing the little laser beam light at her. It keeps shooting out windows, reflecting one way or another and letting her go on and continue her obsessive cleaning routines.<\/p>\n<p>Little does Jeff know that as those misfires with the Womote 3000 send that beam anywhere but Gina, the laser beam does in fact cross paths with other women.<\/p>\n<p>Kimmy Wheeler bicycling down the sidewalk near Jeff&#8217;s home is blinded by one beam from the Womote 3000 and falls from her bike. Checked on by a nearby neighbor and her favorite teacher Mr. Lansing, her mind suddenly craves a thirst quencher like no other as the confused teacher is helpless to resist her oral advances.<\/p>\n<p>Further attempts at simply getting his wife to bring him that beer have everyone from a flight attendant on a circling jet above to a couple of older girl scouts falling victim to desires they never realized they had. Yes, Jeff discovers, some days truly suck&#8230; though sucking might not always be so bad.<\/p>\n<p>In the end, Jeff&#8217;s team may have no shot at scoring but Jeff sure does, even if Gina has company on the receiving end. As for his beer&#8230; well somethings might just remain a mystery in this fall Klassic.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.smashwords.com\/books\/view\/479704\" target=\"_blank\">Find it on Smashwords now!<\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/dp\/B00NXBIJC4\" target=\"_blank\"><br \/>\nNow On Amazon!<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jeff is enduring a humiliating performance on television by his favorite college football team. Worse, he&#8217;s just finished his beer and really needs another. Not wanting to leave his chair, to miss a second of the sucky game, Jeff begins trying to use the Womote 3000 from Trance-tory to make his stubborn wife Gina bring &hellip; <\/p>\n<p><a class=\"more-link btn\" href=\"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/09\/25\/get-a-klassic-game\/\">Continue reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":36837,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[38,4],"tags":[70,63],"class_list":["post-36836","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-kreme-klassics","category-tales-from-the-kreme","tag-kreme-klassics","tag-tales-from-the-kreme","item-wrap"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/AheadoftheGame-cover.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2iXk7-9A8","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":36658,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/09\/04\/september-is-fresh-with-kreme-klassics\/","url_meta":{"origin":36836,"position":0},"title":"September is fresh with Kreme Klassics!","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"September 4, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"September arrives and the Kreme is making this month an all Klassic Kreme month! Nine of the most asked for Kreme stories, rewritten, improved and full of fresh Kreme! But why you ask? Because October is coming and that means the annual Halloween with the Kreme spectacular is just around\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Kreme Klassics","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/kreme-klassics\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"September Horny Girls Ad","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/SeptemberHornyGirls-Ad.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/SeptemberHornyGirls-Ad.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/SeptemberHornyGirls-Ad.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2382,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2013\/03\/24\/the-arcade-is-ready-to-play\/","url_meta":{"origin":36836,"position":1},"title":"The Arcade is ready to play&#8230;","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"March 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"Gamers are all about their games. But sometimes the games play the Gamers. When that happens anything can, and usually does, happen. You might not find many video game arcades today, but if you find this one bring lots of quarters to play with... Find it on Smashwords now! Now\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Kreme Klassics","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/kreme-klassics\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Game On Game Off by Kris P. Kreme","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/GameonGameoff-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/GameonGameoff-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/GameonGameoff-cover.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/GameonGameoff-cover.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/GameonGameoff-cover.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/GameonGameoff-cover.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":29574,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/04\/17\/the-kreme-of-the-krop-for-2014-is-in\/","url_meta":{"origin":36836,"position":2},"title":"The Kreme of the Krop for 2014 is in!","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"April 17, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"It's time again for The Kreme of the Krop, the best Kreme wrapped in a nice curvy package. This year's Krop includes SINtendo Whee YOO! and Bimbo Bombed, as well as three never before seen Kreme Klassics. In Opposites Attract, watch brainy girl Chloe break down inhibitions at Club Trance,\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Tales from the Kreme","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/tales-from-the-kreme\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Kreme of the Krop 2014 by Kris P. Kreme","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Kremeofthe-Krop2014-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Kremeofthe-Krop2014-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Kremeofthe-Krop2014-cover.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Kremeofthe-Krop2014-cover.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Kremeofthe-Krop2014-cover.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/Kremeofthe-Krop2014-cover.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1405,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2012\/12\/03\/the-first-of-the-kreme-klassics-arrive-animedna-is-kremier-than-ever\/","url_meta":{"origin":36836,"position":3},"title":"The first of the Kreme Klassics arrive! AnimeDNA is kremier than ever!","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"December 3, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"One of the most popular tales from the Kreme is now the first of a new series of Kreme Klassics! A tale that has been completely re-edited, cleaned up, and extended to perfection. The original tale was the first award winning story written by the Kreme, now available as never\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Kreme Klassics","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/kreme-klassics\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"AnimeDNA by Kris P. Kreme","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/AnimeDNA-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/AnimeDNA-cover.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/AnimeDNA-cover.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/AnimeDNA-cover.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/AnimeDNA-cover.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/AnimeDNA-cover.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":37030,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2014\/11\/03\/november-is-thanksgiving-kreme-stuffing-month\/","url_meta":{"origin":36836,"position":4},"title":"November is Thanksgiving Kreme Stuffing Month!","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"November 3, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"Everyone knows about Black Friday, but what about Thanksgiving Kreme Stuffing Month? This month the Kreme is releasing collections of some of his best works for much less than you would have to pay to get them all! Klassics! Konversations! SINtendo! and many more! Special collections of many of the\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Kreme Klassics","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/tag\/kreme-klassics\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Thanksgiving Kreme Stuffing Month","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/ThanksgivingKremeStuffingMonth-promotion.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/ThanksgivingKremeStuffingMonth-promotion.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/ThanksgivingKremeStuffingMonth-promotion.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/ThanksgivingKremeStuffingMonth-promotion.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/ThanksgivingKremeStuffingMonth-promotion.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/ThanksgivingKremeStuffingMonth-promotion.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2355,"url":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/2013\/03\/20\/the-first-krop-is-in\/","url_meta":{"origin":36836,"position":5},"title":"The first Krop is in!","author":"Kris P. Kreme","date":"March 20, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"In the orchard of orgasmic tales, only the most memorably moaning make it to market. Those tales are called the Kreme of the Krop. For this first annual Kreme of the Krop, six sensationally sexual stories are brought together for one unbelievable blast of bliss, a bargain seen once a\u2026","rel":"","context":"","block_context":{"text":"Kreme Klassics","link":"https:\/\/www.talesfromthekreme.com\/tales\/category\/kreme-klassics\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Kreme of the Krop 2013 by Kris P. 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