Lewis the Lecherous Lawnmower by Kris P. Kreme
Lewis was granted all the power of Lenny the Lecherous Leprechaun, granting wishes in only the most twisted perverse way, though Lewis has adapted and learned to enjoy each wish, understanding that he corrupts himself further each time.
Typically he avoids conversations where the phrase “I wish” might come up, but after the Sanders family lets him go from mowing their expansive lawn, Lewis chooses to say goodbye with a special performance, one they may “wish” they’d been able to avoid.
Lewis is the closest thing to a legacy for Lenny the Lecherous Leprechaun. Unlike Lenny though, Lewis doesn’t spend a majority of the year in hiding, keeping to the shadows. The hot summer sun doesn’t provide many shadows and Lewis is spending most of it as he usually does, mowing lawns in nice neighborhoods to earn some extra money.
This year, Lewis has one skill not advertised with his lawn mowing expertise. It’s a skill no one wants to experience but one family is about to take the first steps to doing just that.
Gavin and Dawn Sanders were always close friends to his mom, back before she mysteriously vanished and the new “doll” in Lewis’ dad life appeared. The Sanders family is wealthy, has been loyal to always having Lewis do their lawn, and even provided the enjoyment of both Dawn and her daughter Daphne being knockout gorgeous.
Lewis hasn’t had a complaint until the day Dawn asks if he’d come inside after he’s done mowing the lawn. It seems the time has come for Lewis to say goodbye to the plush pocket padding job that is the Sanders’ yard. Daphne has a new boyfriend and that boyfriend is starting his own landscaping service so naturally, the boyfriend is in, Lewis is out.
As angry as this all makes Lewis, the casual attitude of the Sanders makes it even worse and when Lewis has a grudge to hold, others best be warned to play nice.
Smiling, Lewis knows just the way to leave the Sanders’ residence if he’s going to have to lose their business anyway and that’s with an impromptu magic show, one where he uses his special talents to grant them each a wish.
Only Lewis and Lenny, the one who cast this cursed gift onto him, know just how these wishes will play out, but the Sanders are not taking Lewis serious at all.
After all the wishes are made, this is one family that will be much closer than ever, Gavin deciding that it’s time he paid much more attention to his stepdaughter, Daphne, in ways Daphne never imagined before, and Dawn suddenly realizing just how supportive she needs to be to both of them.
By the time Lewis tires of watching the wealthy family thoroughly enjoy their twisted wishes, Daphne’s boyfriend arrives to a rather unexpected sight. Lewis may not be their lawnmower anymore but he’s definitely still cutting them down to size.
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