Sep 10 2019

Speaking for SINtendo is pretty hard

SINtendo Spokesmodel by Kris P. Kreme

SINtendo Spokesmodel by Kris P. Kreme

SINtendo has never had a commercial, much less a spokesmodel promoting their products, but Eliana may have been the closest to getting the position. Unfortunately for the young talented actress, she ended up getting plenty other positions when Jonny and Burt tackled the challenge of filming a SINtendo commercial and hired her for it.

While Jonny doesn’t get Burt’s attitude about how this commercial will turn out, he has refused to expose himself to the story behind SINtendo, a visionary director wanting to create something fresh and exciting.

In the end he might get everything fresh and exciting, but Eliana will be the source of most of that excitement.


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Jonny and Burt have been partners on many productions, Jonny a visionary director who hopes to one day make it big doing more than just commercials, Burt an expert at camera operating and generally a great partner to have… until the day of their latest production, a job for a client so secretive it required non-disclosure agreements.

As Jonny directs the crew of grunt workers, mostly local downtown help, to position the backdrop, the stage, the heavy camera equipment just right, Burt is having nothing to do with it, continually being negative about this commercial not being needed, that the company never uses commercials and there’s a very good reason why not.

Having refused to look up too much about the company, SINtendo, Jonny likes to approach a marketing campaign commercial with fresh eyes, no bias, no influence from past advertisements for the company, but as Burt claims SINtendo never had any past advertising.

The way this commercial is supposed to work is simple, the only directives given to Jonny by the company being that they have their chosen spokesmodel on stage at some point saying the special line and pressing the demonstration mode activation button on the latest SINtendo gaming system.

Everything else is up to Jonny and he has selected the perfect backdrop, a hip active young tangerine shade of orange, told his selected model to wear a nice contrasting shade of blue. This is a big industry Jonny has never been able to break into, the gaming industry and since this has the potential to just be the first of many commercials using his carefully chosen actress as the spokesmodel, Jonny is all enthused, and only more and more annoyed at Burt’s negative attitude about everything.

But Burt knows SINtendo, and according to Burt, there is no way this commercial will be able to air on television, not if things go the way he suspects they will go when the demo mode is activated as required. What Burt thinks is that SINtendo knew the ad would go bad, and they aim to release the footage, whatever happens, as some viral online marketing scheme to boost their sales.

But could that be true, could SINtendo have known the commercial was going to go off script? Jonny dismisses even the notion of that, and he seriously does not like what Burt says about his chosen spokesmodel actress Eliana. As Burt so bluntly puts it, there’s just no way Eliana is getting through this commercial shoot without probably becoming little more than a set of fuck holes to use and abuse.

Enraged at his longtime partner’s words and attitude, Jonny has little choice since he needs someone with camera knowledge on set and the rest of the crew is mostly inner city guys who simply have the strength to move heavy equipment around, mostly hulking muscular black guys just appreciating the work he was happy to offer them. So when Eliana arrives she certainly has the crew’s attention, and after Jonny directs her through the line and motions for his visionary commercial she may end up having a whole lot more.

Why is it that when she first says the line and activates the demo mode on that SINtendo system, Jonny suddenly is having second thoughts about how she says it? Why is it that he just finds her saying it a bit too smartly, overthinking the words? And why is it he’s quickly agreeing with Burt on a surprisingly unprofessional method to ensure Eliana is nicely dumbed down and saying the line with just the right amount of enthusiasm and passion?

There’s a very good reason SINtendo never advertises and this is that reason, uncut and uncensored for SINtendo September.


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