The FATness Machine by Kris P. Kreme
When new apartment tenant Vanessa, goes to the touted fully functional fitness center she was given a brochure about, she’s not thrilled. It seems the brochure is twenty years old, and all the fitness equipment is broken down.
Angry about that, she’s always had an obsessive fear of men, yet manages to put the man who oversees the fitness center and his maintenance guy in their place after spotting a single machine that is both modern and fully functional. But is there anything to their warnings that the machine has problems, is on loan, left by a woman who claimed anyone using it would get fat?
Hot Shots spirals into the Kremey Zone, and someone might be making a special appearance!
Or will hearing the accented perverse words somehow truly change Travis’ mind about his intentions for their honeymoon?
Is the heat getting to you readers, or could it be you’re working out too hard? The star of the next titillating tidbit of a tasty torrid tale may have the answer.
Vanessa has always been relieved that she never had the overly curvy body that draws too many glances, has always been glad that she never had the plump peach of an ass or big tits, because features like those in women her age just make them easy targets to be objectified, victimized, and quite possibly just perversely assaulted and treated as pure objects of male enjoyment.
But just because Vanessa never wanted that kind of body doesn’t mean the recent college grad who moved into her own apartment doesn’t take care of the slender fit body she does have. And that is why she finds herself at the apartment fitness center, an amenity she was glad to hear about when signing her lease… but one she finds is nowhere near as fully functional as advertised.
Obsessing about the dangers of men, Vanessa isn’t thrilled that she even has to speak to a man about why none of the equipment in the fitness center appears functional. But she is quickly making Tyler who handles day to day operations around the fitness center aware of the fact she is nobody to mess with and the brochure she was given when moving in clearly showed a fully functional fitness center for residents only.
Unfortunately Tyler is pointing out that those brochures are twenty years old, from way back when the apartments first opened, and maintenance guy Dwayne is doing his best to get things back up and running within the next year.
As Tyler explains, most residents just either use the weights or some of the old stationary bikes, but not the fancier more full-body workout machines Vanessa intended to put to use.
But Vanessa spots a machine that looks practically unused, sitting against a row of tinted windows to the outdoor parking area, and whatever it is, the fancy machine is a lot more modern and undamaged than the rest, so naturally she asks Tyler why she can’t just use that machine?
And that is when Tyler seems nervous, quickly saying that machine isn’t available for use, just on loan until a replacement arrives, left there by a woman with explicit instructions that nobody use it, no matter what.
All Tyler tells Vanessa is that the machine has problems. But Vanessa is intrigued by the machine and angry that some man is going to tell her she can’t use a machine in a fitness center she was promised was fully functional. So looking at the machine more closely, she assumes the problem it has is a rather ridiculous cosmetic issue… a misspelled name which she points out.
The FATness Machine, that is the title on it, and it’s the last stupid little piece of the puzzle that Vanessa is determined to solve, getting her day back on track. Letting Tyler know she intends to use that machine, stupid name or not, she needs a good workout and fitness or FATness, she’s getting that workout.
And so as she climbs onto the elevated machine, setting desired tension, speed, and quickly stepping into the pedals, Vanessa is finally getting the workout she needs, a workout to stay fit in case some deviant creep around the apartment complex attacks her and does horrible things to her poor body, which is a frequent obsession of the somewhat paranoid Vanessa.
Meanwhile Tyler is just going back to what he was doing, ignoring Vanessa until maintenance guy Dwayne arrives, seeing her on the machine the woman very clearly told the two of them NOT to let anyone use. And Dwayne has had a serious obsession with that woman, a gorgeous creature he does not wish to upset.
And when Tyler says he didn’t tell Vanessa what would happen to her if she used it, Dwayne is quick to walk over and introduce himself, putting the mysterious warning they were given bluntly… any woman that used The FATness Machine would get fat.
Naturally Vanessa is assuming it to be some stupid joke, another man being a man, and she is not getting off the machine, not since it really is providing a nice workout, perfectly paced for what she needs in a piece of gym equipment. Dealing with an angry woman like this isn’t exactly Dwayne’s favorite situation either so he just gives up, suggesting maybe Vanessa flip through the little laminated manual on the machine, at least to understand he isn’t joking.
But just what will Vanessa think of the rather oddly written manual speaking of the importance of balance, a stabilizing force in nature, and something about logic flowing along channels of calm?
Where is this mysterious FATness Machine really on loan from, and who is the strange woman who left it in this rundown apartment fitness center?
And is it their imagination, her imagination, or is Vanessa definitely gaining fat in places men certainly don’t mind the fat on a woman like her as she uses the machine?
Find out in a truly twisted tale… one that may just take readers back into a familiar place from which all Kremey tales originate, and a familiar face may be making yet another cameo in the end.
Coming next… SINtendo gets really hot…
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